The Grannery, Dunfermline

My apologies for appearing to have the same name as the person who wrote this review (he is a friend of mine and, without my knowledge, used my computer to write it). Having read it, I feel I must redress the balance. The establishment in question was not one of my favourite places; the food was of a frankly underwhelming standard, and the atmosphere was quite unpleasant: physically, because it was full of smoke; and, in other respects, because it seemed to attract the wrong kind of crowd, who were more interested in starting fights and shouting abuse than behaving like civilised people. I use the past tense because the place has now regained some of its former glory, having been relieved of its Hungry Horse status. Some brief research on the internet has shown me that the Hungry Horse brand is not generally highly thought of; it is an exercise in style over substance, or would be, if it had even style. It is somewhat depressing to reflect that one can drive for hours and for hundreds of miles, from here in the east of Scotland to the southwest of England, and the first thing that one often sees is a Hungry Horse sign. Still, no one ever went broke by underestimating the taste of the public...

It's been a while since I left a comment on this website but I am pleased to report that the Granary is no longer a Trojan - er, Hungry - Horse and serves decent food once again. However I must thank the Hungry Horse for the opportunity of some absolutely first-rate slagging material. Farewell, oh equestrian one, we hardly knew ye.

I must admit that the comment I posted was somewhat outrageous in its content. I must stress that what I wrote was not in any way a reflection against the staff of this place because, as an ex-worker, I count them amongst my friends and I know that they are doing an absolutely excellent job under the circumstances. The problem I have is to do with the way in which the Granary, previously a good place to eat and drink, became a faceless clone under the Hungry Horse trading name currently traversing the UK. The Granary used to have an identity which stood for good, varied food and a certain individuality which, sadly, has since been lost.

My thanks to the ex-Granary worker (fife) who felt I had used superbly diplomatic language. As I said, the place can be a hit or miss. It's always interesting to find out what goes on behind the scenes of these places. I have used some of the other establishments within the chain and again it's a hit-or-miss experience but cheap compared to other chains so I guess you get what you pay for. To be honest, it wasn't any better when privately owned. Hopefully you were one of the employees that had a personality as that is often lacking. Barman Duncan does well and some more staff with his attitude would be good, though I don't think he'll stay long.

The Honourable Gentleman must be congratulated on his choice of superbly diplomatic language. To call this miserable pub chain anything other than diabolical is like calling the North Pole tropical. As someone who used to work there, I can assure all readers that the place - and I mean that word generically: it doesn't apply to just one particular outlet - is astonishingly bad. The food is of a standard which Neanderthal man would send back; the selection of beers is more limited than oxygen on the moon; and the puns on the menu, which the writers obviously think are hilarious, do nothing other than add more misery to the long-suffering customer. Take my advice and STEER CLEAR of ANY of these outlets. Not since the Black Death has such misery been inflicted on the UK.

That chain of pubs seems appropriately named, for after such a long wait you could probably eat one!

One of Confucious' lesser known sayings:

'Quite often the source

Of a meat cource

Is hource'.