Lasting Love: The 5 Secrets of Growing a Vital, Conscious Relationship
Gay Hendricks, PH.D. and Kathlyn Hendricks, PH.D.
Rodale, 2004, $21.95, 249 pp.
ISBN: 1579548326

The Hendricks make a strong case that people can achieve much if not all they want out of life while also becoming closer to their significant other if they are willing to commit the time and effort to do so. LASTING LOVE provides a method to achieve a closer commitment with a loved one. Based on a study of 2000 plus couples, the Hendricks isolated five prime causes that often kill relationships: (1) "an imbalance between the creative energy each partner contributes " (2) "a lack of emotional honesty" (3) "an unwillingness to accept responsibility " (4) "deep-seated commitment problems" and (5) "a deficiency of daily appreciations". The Hendricks offer detailed solutions to overcome any of these obstacles to include an action plan to change the relationship for the better. Finally there are joint activities aimed at improved communication between partners.

LASTING LOVE: The 5 Secrets Of Growing A Vital, Conscious Relationship is well written and easy to understand. The anecdotal stories and sample dialogs enable the reader to better comprehend what the Hendricks are describing. However, though a strong self help book, it takes two to apply and many couples will find the cost of adhering to the entire meticulous program quite difficult, but those who do will feel rewarded. Even using segments though not intended that way is useful. I tried a few exercises with my spouse and the communication techniques with my son. Though we honestly talked I did not like hearing what my son said about my book reviewing "obsession".

Harriet Klausner