Legoland, Windsor Review

Overall Rating

Legoland. Bought tickets in advance so didn't have to queue to get in. After that it was abysmal. Went on one ride all day and queued for that for two hours and lasted about two minutes! No other ride was possible to go on! Queues too long. The rides are also designed so as you can't see the real line until you are too far in to get out again and the people exiting the ride leave from another area so they can't tell you not to bother. I am amazed that people come back here. A woman in front of us had been on the Laser Raiders before(the only ride we went on) and afterwards I could only imagine she likes to be disappointed, I've been on better Ghost Trains in funfairs for £2. The place is run by children. The food is terrible. The hint was there that it was going to be bad as the first thing we did was try to go on one of the train rides but a 16 yr old in a red fleece told us it had "technical difficulties" and was closed. Then turned around and saw a hot dog stand presided over by another child but he couldn't sell us any as they weren't cooked yet. That's bad management as he had four trays available so they should have been continually cooking. He sent us to a schoolgirl with another stand but she didn't have any onions and tried to send us to another boy around the corner. Since I assumed the next guy wouldn't have any buns for the dogs I took my chances with no-onions girl. Paid ten pounds for 3 hot dogs without onions on freezing bread. Later spent 6.50 for three pieces of dried out chicken and chips. Chips were good but cold and the infant serving me had no salt. I don't expect great food in a theme park. I know what they serve but I would expect salt and onions as basic accompaniments if for nothing more than to drown out the taste. Place is completely over sold, dangerous even, almost impossible to move through. You queue for toilets, food, drinks, rides and shops. I saw one queue with about fifty people in it and thought that doesn't look too bad for a line for a ride until I noticed it was actually a line for chocolate waffles. These people are mad. By the end of the day I saw a mixture of very happy weirdoes and very frustrated and conned people. Then you have to get out. I thought I was actually going to die, first from the crush of nutters trying to get out, then from the two hours, yes two hours, it took to leave the car park and road out, about one mile in all. This is mainly because five-year olds in florescent bibs are trying to direct the stream of traffic. Instead of emptying a car park at a time they just let everyone drive towards them and bunch up together then wander over to each other scratching their heads and shrugging their shoulders at angry parents swearing at them. They don't even have radios which would at least give some semblance of authority and intelligence. Positively: Miniland is very good. Fireworks were great. But this is a serious waste of money. I would rather eat my own face than go back again. I don't care how you think you can plan your day, you will not enjoy this if you have ever been on a family day out and had any expectations fulfilled. I told my son that I hoped he enjoyed it because the next time he would be going would be with his own children.