Memoirs of a Geisha Review

Good Points
Cinematography

Bad Points
More 2006 fashion video than 1930's Japan. An upmarket melodrama in the worst tradition of romance fiction - flabby and unbelievable.

General Comments
Memoirs of a Geisha is indeed, as many have said, a cherry-blossom laden Westernised vision of Japan - with the most schmaltzy Hollywood ending since Doris Day and Rock Hudson rode off into the the sunset - (and I think the joke was on us, dear reader!)



As a non-Japanese with an interest in the culture, I found several inaccuracies; although trivial on their own, cumulatively eroded my enjoyment of the whole. Before I saw the film, I was willing to overlook the use of so many non-Japanese actors, but having seen the film, I have come to the conclusion it was rather like allowing Frenchman to re-enact the Battle of Naseby (for US readers make that Gettysburg). Yes, they could be made to look the part, well nearly, but they certainly didn't sound like it. As a result, in the end the portrayal was unconvincing.



While the kimono's were largely correct and gorgeous, the makeup and hairstyles, were much less so. Although set in the 1930's, the hairstyles adopted are far more likely to be seen on today's catwalks than on Maiko and Geiko of 70 years ago. The white geisha make-up was all but non-existent - all the principal actresses sported Max Factor pouts from the off.



The performances were solid throughout. Li Gong relishes her part, and the young Suzuka Ohgo as the young Chiyo (Sayuri) stood out. Ziyi Zhang is beautiful, but she is simply not Japanese. Michelle Yeoh is indeed elegant and beautiful as Mameba, the mentor of Sayuri, but I found her long brown hair a reminder of her days as a Bond girl, and this trivial annoyance kept drawing me away from the 1930's.



The hero - the Chairman - played mercifully by a Japanese, Ken Watanabe, aged not one iota in the 26 years of the story, falling in love with the heroine who was all of 9 at the time. The nine year old heroine instantly fell in love with him too. Why? All because he bought her a cherry ice, a little bit of kindness in her life of drudgery. I found that scenario entirely too much to accept, and is it really the best example of female psychology the script could come up with?



But wait, hang psychology, as in the tradition of the worst western romantic fiction; the women are either, (both in the case of Hatsumomo played by Li Gong) - or dewy eyed victims waiting for Fate and prayer to save them from all their undeserved suffering at the hands of others. And of course, also in the tradition of the worst romantic fiction, by the end, Fate and/or prayers are always answered in full for the heroine.



Sayrui's dance scene (an after-thought) was a bad idea. It was far too modern and looked like a perfume advert or a catwalk warm up to me... Although flawed, I found myself constantly thinking of James Clavell's 'Shogun' - particularly the beauty of the actresses. Undoubtedly there was a Japanese actress who could have taken the lead, but given the actresses cast were names from other box-office smashes, you don't have to look too far for the Producers thinking.



On the positive side, I was impressed by the cinematography, but in the end, the glory of the visuals only made me more discontent that the adaption did not match it. The surprising fact that the film was largely shot in Hollywood could be seen as a plus, except that it probably reveals more than intended. Maybe no Japanese studio worth their salt would have put their Mon onto such a loose and fundamentally flawed depiction of what is a complex, artistic and spiritual culture as that of the world of the Geiko.



I was hoping for more than a slick, up-market melodrama. Perhaps if this story had been animated by Disney as a sort of Japanese Cinderella - with few saccharin songs along the way - I would have enjoyed it more. All the actors have made better films, seek them out.