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★☆☆☆☆

“Mark Group - the herpes of energy efficiency”

written by Violated_House on 07/03/2015

Once upon a time there was an innocent house. One day a suave man called Mark arrived, looked her up and down, and took a shine to her. "Together we could be amazing" he said, "I'll make you feel warm inside, warmer than you've ever felt".
Being inexperienced the house was nervous, and asked him if it was the right thing to do. "Wont it damage me? Are there any risks?"

"Oh no" said Mark, "I know what Im doing....trust me, everyone is doing it - the government are even recommending it".

So the house gave in, and Mark filled her full of his white fluff, and everything seemed fine. Then a while later, the house started to feel different. She wasn't warm inside, and she started to show blotchy patches. Soon these spread, and bits started to flake off.
She called Mark thinking he could help - I mean he was so nice, and he knew what he was doing....so she called...and called...and called. Eventually she got a response, but Mark didn't want to know. "Oh no, nothing to do with me, must be something else" he said.

Things got worse, so again Mark was called. After months of leaving messages and waiting for a call back he finally responded "My white fluff never causes problems, definitely not my fault".

The house was getting worse so called in a professional, who told her she had a damp infection caused by the fluff and gave her a report to prove it. So the house went back to Mark, who eventually sent someone out to survey the house. "Oh well its not my fault, its...ummm....yours. Yep, think that's about it - goodbye".

The moral of this story is don't use Mark Group - they'll screw you and leave you with a problem you cant get rid of.

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