Written on: 13/04/2012
If you enjoy elevator music, being on hold for an eternity then being cut off unexpectedly you will love vodafone's customer services helpline.
I do and am delighted to learn that for only £36 a month i get this kind of alternative 'help' all year round. What a deal!
I am proud that in this economic climate Vodafone employment policy is very much equal opportunities. Judging by the individuals I spoke to no CV is required to work at Vodafone, just excrete in a bag for them to confirm through DNA testing that you are a human, and you have a job.
One more cost cutting tip for vodafone, if you do read this, instead of employing anyone in the customer services team. Hand out a pistol and a single round in a 'break glass in case of any issues' container with every handset sold. Not only will this be cheaper for you but also less stressful for your customers.
This will undoubtedly free up some more capital to sponsor an F1 team so you guys on the board can swan about all over the world quaffing champagne and bonking pit girls.
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